November is NANOWRIMO . . .

. . . and it's been kicking my ass.

I spent much of October plotting and taking notes, writing down ideas.

I did really well the first week. I've been pretty lucky because I have a job where I can write at work as long as there isn't something more pressing to do (i.e. - guest at the desk, ringing telephone, etc.)

Today, I forgot my flash drive. So I'm unable to work on the project. I have a backup document in my email but it's a few days old and won't do me much good. I wrote over 3,000 words yesterday. I'll try to write when I get home, to make up for today, but I'm afraid I won't hit the 50,000 word goal.

And that's okay.

Why?

Because the story is crap.

Let me rephrase. The plot is good. The story is crap. I've just been mindlessly writing whatever to up the word count. I've even used a NANOWRIMO plot device this year: The Traveling Shovel of Death.

It's an ingenious idea and I'm quite happy with it. The idea is this: someone dies by shovel. I don't know the origin of it, but it was quite fun to use. It's something I plan to put in next year too, if my story will allow it.

This project will be my longest draft to date, but it won't hit the 50,000 word count by the end of November 30; and like I said, that's okay. It's okay because when I'm done with this draft (whether you consider it draft 0 or draft 1) I'll get to take what I've done so far and . . . fix it.

I'll go back and add details, take out huge, disgusting paragraphs that I wrote when I was hopped up on caffeine and fretting under pressure.

It'll be a relief, quite frankly.

So why do I continue to put myself through this? Because it forces me to write. Sure, I come up with an idea and I work on it for a while, but the inevitable happens: I either get bored with the story or fed up with the characters. It happens every time. And yes, I've been known to go back and work on a story but it tends to get saved on a flashdrive, that I carry around, and there it will stay, collecting virtual dust.

So I've spent nearly the whole of last month putting words on the screen, most of them will be deleted and/or changed by the time I go through it again, after NANOWRIMO.

And that's okay.

Because I was writing.

Happy NANOWRIMO kiddos, let the insanity start all over again next year.